I don't know why some fellow journalists were surprised when a veiled woman presenter from the Islamic Al-Manar satellite channel refused to shake hands with Arab League Secretary-General Amr Moussa during his last visit to Lebanon. Some even went as far as reprimanding the poor creature and reminding her that touching the Secretary-General hand was no mortal sin. Many fellow journalists took the matter lightly and made no attempt to look into the real motives behind the daring and unprecedented move by the Secretary-General of holding out his hand to journalists covering his visit to Beirut. None of them tried to delve into his true and clandestine intentions behind this strange desire to shake hands with the said presenter. Had they done so, there would be no doubt that they would have uncovered the Secretary-General's ulterior motives. Insiders who have been following the Secretary-General's repeated visits to Lebanon confided to me (although this is unattributable) that the only reason why Amr Moussa offered to shake hands with the journalists that day was to touch the hand of that particular Al-Manar presenter - that hand which was carefully tucked inside a black glove. But intuitive as he is known to be, the Secretary-General knew the glove was hiding the sweetest of fingers. Besides, everyone inside and outside Lebanon knows that he has a penchant for veiled beauties and their hidden fingers; a penchant only matched by the overwhelming attraction he has for presenters who don the niqab (full face cover); those who have even more to hide. The Secretary-General's penchant for veiled TV presenters was indeed the topic of choice in Lebanese political circles. Most parties involved in the present Lebanese political crisis are convinced that Moussa's growing number of trips to Beirut over the past few months was not triggered by a desire to end the presidential crisis in their country, as journalists who haven't been following the situation carefully seem to think. In fact the real reason for his trips was another desire altogether - that of touching the fingers of Al-Manar's veiled presenters even from over a glove. His fixation has reached the extent that the failure to find a solution to the Lebanese crisis has become a source of great happiness to him because every time a round of talks failed it gave him an excuse to go back to Beirut for the pleasure of shaking one, or even two hands if he's lucky, of those whose beauty glows from behind the veil and gloves. It's a real disaster that our journalists have failed to note that the Secretary-General of the Arab League wishes that the Lebanon crisis is never resolved, forgets all about the Palestinian issue (hoping that it wouldn't supersede the Lebanese one); forgets all about Iraq and Darfur, the Shebaa Farms, the Gaza blockade and other hot topics only to be preoccupied with what for him is the hottest topic of all - that is, shaking the hands of Al-Manar's veiled presenters. The reason why Al-Manar's presenter refused to shake hands with the Secretary-General of the Arab League who had allegedly gone to Beirut to find a solution to the presidential impasse, was because her religious insight made her see quite clearly his ulterior motives; motives which our journalists didn't bother to tackle the way they became obsessed with the TV presenter incident. And if they had done so, they too would have reached the same conclusion reached by the bright presenter - one that can neither be disputed inside nor outside Lebanon. Long live Al-Manar's veiled TV presenters, for indeed only through them will Palestine be finally liberated, the Lebanese presidential crisis come to an end, together with the war in Iraq, the crises in Darfur, the blockade of Gaza and the Israeli occupation of Shebaa Farms - and all other Arab problems of all sorts. Mohamed Salmawy is President of the Arab Writer's Union and Editor-in-Chief of Al-Ahram Hebdo.
