Why have so many of my middle-aged, middle-class contemporaries ended up living in suburban Cairo when there are hardly any restaurants out there to speak of? I guess there is less pollution out there in the desert suburbs encircling Cairo. The sandy side of Cairo does have its own charms and potential, I suppose. In the middle of nowhere, yet down the road from the American University in Cairo Dusit Thani has the kudos of being in the vicinity of such an esteemed institution of higher learning. Another plus for Dusit Thani is that there are no other five-star hotels in the neighbourhood. One of the plushest eateries acts as something of an interface between the private and public realms. It is cosy and yet conjures up exciting evenings where you can see and be seen in the company of professors and students. There is a distinct Asian theme in the menu and a touch of the Orient in this Thai five-star hotel chain. The irony, though, is that the restaurant itself is named after a European fish — the Branzino. Nevertheless, this is far from a traditional seafood eatery and there are far more meaty dishes than fishy ones. The only dish on the restaurant's menu that comes with its namesake is the sea bass sayedieh served with grilled tomato and lemon. “Not particularly appetising,” Queen Tiye turned her nose up at the idea. We survey the luscious offerings of Branzino. And, we move on from grilled tomato to the appetisers. Gastronomically, Branzino is a mix of Arab, Asian and European comestibles. There were flashes of brilliance in Queen Tiye's Asian salad — iceberg lettuce, wood ear mushroom, sweet corn, cucumber, shrimp and soya with radish dressing. “I can't resist it,” Queen Tiye exclaims at this rather hubristic moment. Redhead is a self-professed outsider. Nevertheless, she tucks in readily. Her homemade ravioli ricotta cheese and tomato herb coulis is not Queen Tiye's cup of tea. Platinum Blonde went for buffalo mozzarella, tomatoes, basil pesto and balsamic reduction. Queen Tiye exhibited her customary aristocratic sangfroid. The Caesar Salad with Parmesan Reggiano, and grilled farm chicken was daintily dressed, tossed with watercress and capers and drizzled with olive oil. Drawing strength from a glass of red wine, Redhead ordered a Niçoise salad, seared tuna, green beens and potatoes. The Australian beef medalions, with Parmesan gnocchi, seared mushroom and asparagus were the perfect articulation of what Branzino is all about. The Platinum Blonde was peering with piggish passion into my veal escalope, potato wedges and rucola salad. Rojan Gosht, Kashmiri lamb curry and Basmati rice created flights of nostalgia for Redhead. Queen Tiye opted for the Norwegian grilled salmon fillet with sautéed vegetables, parsley potatoes and lemon butter sauce. She claimed that the dish was delicious. And, it did look scrumptious. Platinum Blonde pronounced her chicken Ballontine, polenta and fresh garden greens to be “yummy” as well. Half an hour later Redhead suggested that we go for dessert, and we did. “Oh, I'd love one of those,” Platinum Blonde pointed at something from the menu excitedly. “Lemon créme brulee,” she chuckled. “No, I wouldn't,” Queen Tiye hesitated. “I've already had far too much to eat,” she explained apologetically. But then she quickly changed her mind. “Chocolate caraway,” she gave in. “Dessert is a must, I suppose, at such a nice restaurant,” she shrugged her shoulders. And, classic cheese cake and berry compote for me. Branzino Dusit Thani Lake View New Cairo