THE credentials of the candidates in Egypt's parliamentary elections later this year will be all the more impressive if they show that the candidate is a bully in his constituency, has a rich vocabulary of foul words and possesses bulging muscles to terrorise his adversaries in Parliament, as well as being short-tempered and ready to pounce on his/her neighbour, only backing down when the Parliamentary Speaker orders him to. The candidates should also like wearing sturdy leather shoes with hard soles to hurl at their adversaries and injure them. In previous parliaments, it always helped if the candidate was a drug dealer, forger, debt defaulter and a regular customer of prostitutes (whom he never paid of course). Decent candidates, who insist on behaving in a gentlemanly manner under the parliamentary dome and outside, will have no voice if they happened to be the winners in the next parliamentary elections. Female MPs are protected by the new criminal bill, which sentences men, who address a woman or a girl indecently or attempt to touch her body rudely, to a year behind bars. The new qualities have become necessary after two MPs in the current Parliament revived the infamous culture of exchanging foul words and blows, as well as hurling their footwear at their adversaries in Parliament. This disgusting culture came to the fore when the Parliament was discussing the grievances of the striking workers belonging to a privatised company in Tanta, el-Gharbia Governorate. During the discussion, MP Youssri Bayoumi (loyal to the outlawed Muslim Brotherhood) accused MP Ahmed Shobeir (a former goalkeeper and a representative of the ruling National Democratic Party in Tanta constituency) of having vested financial interests in the workers' sufferings. Shobeir, who is the popular presenter of a television sports programme, trembled with anger as he howled: “You are a dirty and debased person. I will teach you a lesson you won't forget for your impoliteness and dirtiness”. The ruling party MP was as good as his word, hurling a chair at his adversary, who cleverly ducked, shielding his head with his hands. Having failed to injure his adversary, the former goalie showed that he had lost none of his agility, as he deftly leapt towards Bayoumi. He would have grabbed him by the throat, hadn't peacemakers managed to separate the pair, nipping Shobeir's violence in the bud. Such behaviour is contagious, as even Parliamentary Speaker Fathi Sorour, a highly respected criminal law specialist, lost his usual, provocative composure when he was asked whether he would stand in the witness box in the case of the Christmas Eve shootingin the Upper Egyptian village of Naga Hamadi near Qena early last month. The defence team for the prime suspect in this incident, in which six Copts and a Muslim were gunned down, claimed that the Parliament Speaker knows the identity of the instigator(s) of this debased crime. “I don't know the prime suspect,” said Sorour, who made slanderous remarks about the suspect, sullying his and his family's reputation. What Sorour said was widely published in the opposition and independent newspapers. The extraordinarily long litany of deputies infamous for their libellous and slanderous remarks against their colleagues includes veteran MP Abdel-Rashim el-Ghoul (representative of the ruling party in the constituency in which the Christmas Eve killings took place). El-Ghoul has been served a subpoena to appear before the Misdemeanour Court, charged with insulting Ms. Georgette Kelini (a Coptic deputy) during an interview he accorded to a television channel. El-Ghoul allegedly described his colleague as 'a criminal woman' who wanted to instigate sectarian strife by circulating unsubstantiated claims about the security authorities in Naga Hamadi and the Coptic head of the city of Qena. Voters across the nation have found the bizarre culture in Parliament 'interestingly curious'. It is unfortunate that the popularity and success of candidates in old and poor districts rely on slanderous expressions, insults and nasty remarks, as well as their readiness to lose control, whether they have good reason to or not. Candidates possessing these qualities should be confident of winning in the forthcoming parliamentary elections, unless the currently serving MPs can behave more disgracefully.
