As the mid-year break comes to and end, many parents sigh with relief. But it need not be the case. Yasmine El-Rashidi finds out that Cairo and kids are becoming quite friendly In parent terminology the word "break" has a specific meaning of its own. In the early years of parenthood, it ceases to have any meaning at all. The concept of an actual "rest" or "time- out" disappears into random hours of wails, and whines, and uninterpreted screams things. As those years pass, and the school year becomes each parents' own calendar and diary of events, "break" assumes a dual personality within the household. For children it means time-out, fun, games, and no rules. For parents, most will readily admit, it spells headache. "I pack my kids up, get the nannies ready, buy our supplies, and go off to the beach," says Niveen Shehata, a mother of three little "horrors", as she calls them, aged between five and nine. "If we stayed here [in Cairo] during the mid-year break, it would be a mad house. This one wants this, that one wants something else, this one wants to go here, Karim doesn't like that, Sarah said this, he did that. It's endless," she laughs. She is not alone, popular consensus states, and certainly not the only mother of three, or two, or four, who is faced with school recess turmoil. And while Shehata may not yet term her little trio "terrorists" -- as other mothers do -- the holiday situation, with all her love for them, is still quite dire. But it doesn't need to be. "The options for young children, and even teenagers, have really widened," says Susan Maghraby, a private English tutor to students from numerous private schools around the city. "When my children were young, there weren't many options," she says of her now 20- something year-olds. "There was the club, and a few day trips. Now there are endless activities available, suited for children with varying hobbies and needs." The range includes riding schools, basketball camps, football leagues and general fitness programmes. "Sporting clubs, for example, offer much more structured programmes," she says. "They now plan their activities according to the children's schedules." But the choices now extend far beyond the realm of the traditional sport-oriented mid- year, or summer schools. The sphere of the arts, an arena not previously recognised, and certainly not endowed with the funds or awareness it warrants, is now assuming, at its own steady pace, a growing place amidst the community of kids in Cairo. "The place of children, and their needs, and education, is changing in society," says Betty Toth, who has been teaching at language schools in Egypt for seven years. "Since I first arrived in the country, I've definitely seen a shift." It's not simply a social change, but a cultural one too; the importance of allowing children to create, explore and express, is crossing the lines of the high profile private schools, into the wider circle of society. Toth capitalises on that. "I have a six-year-old and a nine-year- old," she says. "They get bored quite easily," she laughs, talking about what a struggle it was in her first years in Egypt, to keep them busy all holiday long. "It's not like that any more, because of the choices. I've had them at the Opera House workshop [the art product of which will be displayed at the Opera's Metro Gallery at the end of the workshop]," she says. "It's wonderful in that it allows children a venue for self-expression through art. Sports are wonderful, and activity is crucial to the development of a healthy child, a solid self- esteem, and sound well-being," she continues. "But it's certainly not enough." The experts agree. "Self-expression is not given the space and importance it should be," says psychologist Nancy Abdullah. "The process of exploring themselves through colour and clay and paint plays a big role in the developmental process. When you put paint, and clay, and paper and glue and scissors in front of a child and allow him or her to do what they want, the outcome on this child, as a human being, is much more profound, and much more lasting, than if you tell them, "here are your tools, paint a picture of your family, and cut out your pets and friend from the coloured paper and stick them on the painting, and then make a clay pot. That's not art." And it's certainly not self- expression. Music is much the same. "It's great to get your child a flute or a piano, and get them a great teacher, and have them practice and become A-class musicians," she says. "But you have to keep things in perspective. When you enroll your child in a camp, or school, for the mid-year break, or for the summer, you need to really assess why you've chosen that particular school." The dream of being a Michael Jordan, Monica Seles, Tiger Woods, or even a Van Gough, may, in many cases be the masked desire. But is that quite enough? "Developing the ability to focus, to be disciplined, and to complete a task is very important," Abdullah expresses. "But we get too carried away with that. As parents, we choose what we want our child to focus on. We do a great job creating superstar scenarios in their heads and making them believe, for example, that they want to be the next Andre Agassi. I am not an advocate of should," she laughs, "but children shouldn't have to focus so young. They need to be involved in lots of different sports, and they need to be given an outlet for free-flowing artistic expression, and they need to be allowed to just sit down at a piano and finger out, or bang out, whatever headache of a sound they want." And all the options, she says, are there. The Opera House not only has a creative expression workshop in which children are given the materials, and necessary encouragement to explore, but also a more structured Educational Department Centre for Artistic Talents, aimed to spread awareness and education, and promote fine arts in Egypt. The centre comprises six departments: Opera Studies (age 16+), Piano Division (10-20yrs), Classic Ballet Division (6-11yrs), Choral Group Division (6- 11yrs), Suzuki Violin Division (4yrs+), and the Arabic and Instrumental Music Department. "But programmes like these are much like putting your child into one sports' school and psychologically instilling in them the need and desire to be a champion," Abdullah warns. Her suggestion is that mid-year break is the chance to let go, express freely, and get away from any sort of imposed ideas, expression, or norms. "Most children have two weeks," she says. "Whether it's mid-year or Easter, I suggest enrolling children in something like Art Fun, or Fagnoon. A place to express themselves." (See p.26) "Fagnoon", a name that combines the words fonoon (arts), and magnoon (wild), is a getaway on the Saqqara Road. A ranch-like place, it is the epitome of nature, and self- expression and awareness, and the so-called childhood free-spirit, for children in Cairo. Geared towards three to 13-year-olds, Fagnoon provides them the chance to explore themselves through paint, pottery, gardening, carpentry, baking, body-painting, jewelry- making, and the simple pleasure of running wild, in the fresh air and open space. "Children can really let loose there," says Dalia Hawary, whose daughter has been to Fagnoon on several occasions. "They don't feel they're being watched, they don't feel uneasy about making a mess, or getting themselves dirty, or making mistakes. There's really no such thing there." In short, children are simply allowed to "be". And whether at Fagnoon, or at the club with a bunch of paper and colours and friends, artistic expression is critical -- not just as a means of communicating ideas and thoughts and feelings, but also as a means of development. "Cognitive development," says Abdullah, "art helps in many other areas of development too." On cairokids.com, a site geared specifically towards both kids and parents, and their needs, an article on "The Importance of Art" looks into the issue. "Physically, art develops their fine motor skills and refines their hand-eye coordination," the article states. "Socially and emotionally, it allows them to express their feelings (e.g. drawing a sad face if they are unhappy; it teaches them to channel frustration and anger in a socially acceptable way (e.g. punching and pounding clay or play- dough); it gives them the opportunity to express pride (by having their work praised); and it encourages them to assert their individuality (by choosing their own materials, colours and designs)." "Over the break, I suggest you surround your children with options for expression and release," Abdullah says. "Take them to places like Fagnoon, to art workshops, take them horse-riding, take them to tennis, take them to the movies, surround them by books, let them feel there is a feast of choices," she stresses. "That will help them explore who they are, what they like and dislike. Eventually, with enough time like this, they will choose a few things and focus. And if they don't it's okay -- they get that focus and discipline in school anyway. The important thing is to give your child choices, and let him or her choose. Very few children will grow up to be famous athletes," she continues. "And they need to know that it's okay, and that it doesn't mean they've failed." That place to express, and develop, and explore -- without constraints and without expectations -- is where all children need to be when they have some time out. And the biggest "should" of all, is that there should be variety, choice, no strict must-do's and must- achieve, and they should, above all, have fun.
