CAIRO - It's quite common to see children weeping in the capital's family courts, while their disputing parents stand nearby shouting at each other. This scene of childhood misery often fills the halls of the Heliopolis Family Court. Hundreds of thousands of children come every year to this building, after living with parents who care little about their offspring's feelings. "Divorce has become too common among couples in today's Egypt," Marwa Abdullah, a psychologist who works at the court, laments. She says that some marriages, which have lasted for as long as 10 or 15 years, could be saved if the man and his wife try to work through their problems and continue together for the sake of their children. "It is the children who pay dearly after the divorce, especially when they reach the age of about 15. At this age, embarrassed, nervous children have to stand before a judge and decide whether they want to live with their mother or father," Marwa explains. She says that children are subjected to physical and emotional trauma after their parents are divorced, either by a unilateral decision on the part of their father or by a court ruling. "Anxiety, depression and other emotional problems hit the children after the divorce," she stresses, adding that parents cannot usually imagine the psychological and physical pain their offspring will suffer after the separation. "The main and direct psychological impact of divorce on children is depression. Children are likely to feel more depressed than their parents after the divorce," Marwa explains. She says that the degree of the symptoms varies, depending on the children's personality, the nature of the problems accompanying the divorce and their age. "The level and degree of depression are likely to be exacerbated if a child feels that he or she is directly responsible for their parents' divorce," Marwa comments. She adds that the symptoms of depression among children of divorced parents include fits of weeping, weight gain, loss of concentration, despair, lack of enthusiasm and motivation, difficulty sleeping and feelings of guilt and insecurity. "These children may suffer from flashbacks, nightmares and fits of anger, as they cannot re-adjust to life after the divorce of their parents," Marwa, who teaches at Ain Shams Univeristy in Cairo, stresses, adding that the physical impact can include headaches and aggressive behaviour. However, she also says that sometimes divorce is a blessing for the children, who have been suffering as a result of living with parents, who have been fighting and abusing each other for years. "Some wives find the courage to leave their drug-addicted or abusive husbands for their children's sake," Marwa explains, adding that today's society does not frown any more on divorce, divorced people or children of divorced couples.
