I come from far away with pictures in my eyes… Of coffee shops in Bosphorus with echoes of the azan at dawn and the midnight streets with Ramadan drums before sunrise. Along endless ways that we are dragged pursuing a dream from one side to another or from one country to another, we constantly learn. It does not matter what our cultural backgrounds, nations, faiths or skin colors are because in fact the way for all of us starts and ends in the same place. On my first trip to the States, there was a scene in my mind that I could not stop seeing. It was a scene from Charles Chaplin’s movie ‘ Arrival in the Land of Liberty’. In the humorous language of Chaplin, passengers on a vessel have dreams and hopes and are excited of being on the way to America. As soon as they arrive and get off the vessel, they find themselves chained. We see the Statue of Liberty in the background. I rewinded it again and again. It reflected through the tense between Muslims and Jews when my Palestinian housemate and I attended the Friday prayer in the Mosque in the Jewish district. It flashbacked from the disquiet of my Hindu publicist the first time he visited our house in which Muslims live and it mixed with the tears in the eyes of my African American manager when he talked about being a black in this country. The first question Americans ask generally is, just after they find out that I am a Turk ‘ Are you Muslim?’ Then they ask again as if they did not hear your answer, ‘ Are you Muslim?’ It is obvious that I do not fit the Muslim woman image in their mind. Or I remember the confusion in my American film director friend’s eyes when he saw my headscarf in my room. He thought I was kidding. He said he could not visualize me praying with my scarf on my head. The thing confuses them the most about me, is that how I could be this sophisticated, educated and even much knowledgeable about their own religion and a Muslim at the same time. Because they generally equate Islam with ignorance and terror, they stare at you as if asking, ‘You know all these things and how can you be still a Muslim?’. After learning the understanding of Islam in this country, you know better that to teach them what real Islam is could only be through a contemporary perspective and image. That day I met the African American man who had replied earlier to my email saying that he was interested in representing me in the Hollywood film industry. I felt as if he was apologizing to disappoint me because he was black. ‘Are my feelings right?’ Probably yes.- Because we Turks don’t have a black people issue in our country and we cant even think about it even as a concept in our minds. We sat in a coffee shop and began to talk. Yes, I was right about how I felt since he constantly talked on how it is hard to be black in this country. I gave him the same day to view my documentary ‘The Transition‘ which includes interviews with people from different religions and underlines the common points in them along with messages on human rights and discrimination. His voice was shivering when he called me a couple of days later. ‘You enlightened me!‘ He shouted on the phone. ‘Enlightened me!’ He asked hesitating after he had calmed ‘Are you really a Muslim?’ - Yes I am. - Do you speak Arabic in your country? - No, we read the Qur'an in Arabic, but we speak Turkish. He then said that how happy he was to have the chance to view the movie. He added that he was a Christian and he had always thought that it was the only truth until he watched it. I was relaxed after I hang up! I said to myself ‘ Maybe it is hard for now but I am on the true path!’ On the other hand, Most Americans do not know anything about Turkey. Sometimes I have doubts if they ever know if such a country exists on earth. Then they have the prejudice towards you as someone coming from an undeveloped Middle Eastern country and they amaze with your knowledge about western culture and music. They hardly believe the point Turkey has come in terms of music and arts when they listen to the Turkish pop music. It reminded once again things I should be proud of when I screened them a short film concerning Ataturk’s struggle for liberty. The movie was over but there was still total silence in the room. They were like frozen… They are aware of the fact that you are fortunate enough being from a deep cultural background and having such a leader who never believed in impossibility and a model that you take to reach your goals. They also hardly comprehend that the land is something holy for Turks. I call it The Gallipoli Culture which teaches us that to defend your land is an honor and a culture in which we learn to feel responsible for those who died to leave a free country behind and founded the republic for us. The passion of Turkish soldiers who did not go to Gallipoli to fight but to die is an unusual phenomenon in this culture. I walked into a house to see a room for rent. The Palestinian young man who was already the resident in, turned to others in the room and said excitedly ‘ She is from Turkey. They are neither Middle Eastern nor Europeans, They are Turks!’ I took a deep breath thinking. ‘ Thanks God, there are people who know us’. He looked at me and continued in happiness ‘ Turkish films are my mother’s favorites!’… When you serve as a sort of messenger on a foreign land with your current and forthcoming projects, you are always in need of funds and sponsorships. Because I consider myself spiritual and try to tell people that all religions are the same thing, I once accepted the support offer of the Christian community here. I had to refuse it when the interview I had had with them was printed. They wrote I had converted to Christianity, which contradicts, totally with my main objective in life. But now who can I ask for support?… I recalled the Ramadan dinner that I attended sometime ago with my American friends. The dinner was organized by the Islamic Foundation of California in order to promote Islam to Christians in the neighborhood. I actually attended the dinner hesitatingly since I am a modern Muslim woman. And I could not figure it out what kind of people I would meet there. However, the chairman of the foundation Dr. Mohammed Hussein, from Bangladesh, behaved very warmly towards me. The thing impressed me the most that night was that Dr. Mohammed read both Quran and Bible pointing to the same verse in both scriptures. I told him straight away the second time we met, ‘ The reason why I am here today is not because you read Quran that night but because you read Bible!’ The movie, ‘The Graduate (1967)‘, ends on the rear seat of the city bus on which Ben (Dustin Hoffman) and Elaine (Katharine Ross) sit side by side. The Sound of Silence (Simon and Garfunkel) is reprised on the soundtrack. Elaine, in her bridal dress, gratefully approves of her kidnapping by Ben from her wedding. Do they actually love or really care for each other, or will their relationship work out fine? – Probably not. They are both very well aware that their futures are very uncertain. Ben has won the object of his Holy Grail quest, but probably lost the love of his life. Therefore, maybe this is the beauty of the physical world. And the important part of it, is not to reach a goal but the experiences we gain and things we learn along the way. ‘Are we missing the moment in the anxiety of the future while lost in the struggle of pursuing our dreams?’ I wonder. Do those all who come with utopic dreams to create a future here, face the fact by the citizens’ concern about their own futures caused by the Health Care Draft Legislation in the illusion of American dream? Why should the past be this important when even the future is unclear and unimportant? Unrecovered wound of African Americans, Jewish genocide, Palestinian genocide or Armenian genocide.. Maybe it is time to forget it all and it is time to move on. We are the passengers on the same path.. It is not an international, intercontinental or intercultural journey.. It is an inner journey in which we learn and grow… I come from far away with a picture you don’t recognize! We strangers know each other now, As part of the whole design!
