Illegal immigration has left many women and their children in the throes of poverty, homelessness and uncertainty Sabeya, dubbed Um Asmaa, does not know how to describe her current status. She is neither divorced nor widowed. Nor is she married in the true sense of the word. Her husband, 30-year-old electrician Hamdi Amin, was among 20 young men from the village of Telbana who disappeared on their way to Italy four years ago. "Nobody told us if they had drowned or were arrested by the authorities in Italy," Sabeya told Al - Ahram Weekly. The four survivors who returned to the village refrained from giving an accurate account of what happened. "Sometimes they say they did not know what happened because they were in another boat and lost track of the others or that they fainted and lost consciousness. It's just hope that keeps me breathing." Sabeya's husband left her with so many burdens to shoulder: two children to feed, Asmaa and Abdel-Rahman, and many debts to pay. "My son was only a few months old when my husband left," Sabeya said with a sigh. Not that she blames her husband. Rather, she blames poverty "which forced people to throw themselves into the sea. "We used to live a hand-to-mouth existence and we never had any stable income. No one would risk his life and savings unless he is forced to. Life is so bitter." Sabeya's husband was forced to sell the only asset he had, a small piece of land, and also get a bank loan to pay for the trip. Sabeya is thus left with no assets and no husband -- nothing. Her in-laws passed away before she got married and was forced to live with her impoverished parents who already had many mouths to feed. "My brothers, however, were a great support and helped me pay the debts," she went on. "Then I decided I should depend on myself because my father was a poor tenant farmer and it was too much for him." Sabeya is now living on her own with her two kids and the source of her livelihood -- poultry. She scoffs at the idea of catching the deadly Avian Flu because of keeping the chickens indoors. "I leave it to God. It's all a matter of fate," she said with a smile. "I have no other choice. I cannot go out to work now that I'm neither married nor divorced and at the same time I cannot depend on anybody to feed me and my kids now that life is becoming increasingly expensive." Um Asmaa, however, considers herself luckier than others. She said that many women in the village where she lives are living in similar circumstances. They cannot get a pension because they cannot prove their husbands are dead, nor can they remarry. They are in a state of ambivalence and uncertainly. Many go to live with their in-laws but more often than not that creates problems and ends up with the in-laws getting rid of the wife when her husband goes missing for a long time. And, of course, kids are the first to pay the price. They remain homeless and do not get any education. Sabeya says she has learnt her lesson. "If my husband ever comes back, I would never let him go again even if that means we starve. My children ask about him every day and I feel so lonely without him. It's too tough to be a single mother."
