Egypt is not the only nation whose heritage is under threat, as Jenny Jobbins discovers Britain's Ministry of Heritage has announced a stringent new policy regarding intellectual property rights and the protection of its famous national emblems. Eight quintessentially British institutions are to be protected by copyright under the new rules. From now on, it will be illegal to produce certain images or replicas of these "national treasures", and photography of designated sites other than by tourists for private and individual use will also be banned. Reproduction of images for educational purposes, however, will be allowed. The icons are: Stonehenge; the red double-decker bus; Big Ben; the Tower of London; Buckingham Palace; Windsor Castle; the Globe Theatre; and the red telephone box. There has been discussion in parliament as to whether to add other national treasures, as the British fondly call them, such as Dame Judi Dench, Dame Helen Mirren, the Queen and David Beckham to the list. MPs are reportedly undecided, however, questioning whether the Queen and Helen Mirren are one and the same, or vice versa. Any person who seeks to produce a replica or take a photograph of any of the items on the heritage list will need a permit. The income raised is expected to amount to a valuable income for the government in these cash-strapped times. "Ever since photography was invented and people started coming to Britain and writing books about us, our national heritage has been flowing abroad," Heritage Ministry spokesman John Bull said. "It's time to put a stop to this cultural drain and protect what is ours. "Models of London buses are being made in China and no one pays us a penny for using the image. We invented red buses, so why shouldn't they pay?" For a fee, a model of a national icon like a double-decker bus may be manufactured only if the dimensions are not the same as the original. Life-size replicas will be banned outright. "That means it can be smaller or larger than a bus, but not the same size," Bull said. Might this be confusing? "Not to us," Bull replied. Bull said all postcards, posters and commercial books would be seized and banned unless a permit had been granted and paid for. Heavy penalties will be imposed on people who evade the law. Anyone found in possession of any original parts of any of the icons without permission will face a prison term of 25 years and a fine of from GBP50,000 to GBP250,000. Asked about the thousands of red telephone boxes that have been bought in good faith, many of which have been shipped abroad, Bull said the ministry would announce a short amnesty so that anyone who owned such an object would be able to hand it back. "If not, they will go to prison," Bull said. "These are priceless pieces of our heritage and we want the revenue from them." Under the new intellectual property law, provision will also be made to "protect and safeguard the integrity" of the English language. "The Queen's English must be spoken, and proper English usage will be enforced worldwide," Priscilla Pedant, chairman of the quasi-governmental National Committee for the Preservation of English, told this newspaper. Copyrighting the English language might sound a daunting task, but the government insists that the necessary legislature is already in place. "We are confident that the international copyright laws to which Britain is signatory will enable us to enforce this law across the globe," Pedant said. Top of the list of language regulations will be the protection of the definite article. "Anyone who puts a 'the' in the wrong place, or omits it from the right place, will face a fine," Smith said. "We invented this language. It began here in the United Kingdom, and it should not be improperly exported." Also on the list is the use of "different" to mean "various"; confusion over prepositions, especially "for" and "by"; and beginning a sentence with the phrase: "It is worth mentioning that..." Other Western countries are expected to follow Britain's example. The United States government is drafting a law that will copyright its own national treasures, including the Statue of Liberty, and Switzerland is considering a ban on unlicensed replicas or photographs of cow bells. The British government has also added some if its national holidays to the list of inclusion in the new intellectual property law. Many of these holidays have become popular abroad in recent decades. "Holidays such as Valentine's Day and Mothering Sunday began here in Britain," Bull said by telephone from London. Mothering Sunday, when servants in Victorian times traditionally had an annual day off to visit their mothers, has been adopted worldwide as Mother's Day. Bull added that anyone who celebrated such cultural holidays abroad by sending a card or giving flowers would need a permit from the Heritage Ministry in London or from their local British mission. Hotels offering special deals on these occasions would also have to pay a fee or face a hefty fine. Editor's note: One of these special British holidays is April Fools' Day, 1 April -- the day this issue of Al-Ahram Weekly went to press.
