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Violence against men!
Published in The Egyptian Gazette on 11 - 03 - 2013

In a society in which some men feel embarrassed about kissing or hugging their wives in the street for all to see, while at the same time they are willing to beat their wives in front of other people, as if it were something quite normal, Samah was abnormal.
She was spotted by her neighbours beating her husband with one of her slippers.
Her neighbours, used to seeing a man beating his wife, were shocked by this. They were not concerned about the reasons for the quarrel; their only concern was that it is unacceptable for a woman to be seen beating her husband.
Samah beat and insulted her husband, because she would not accept the fact that he had married another woman.
Even when the neighbours discovered the reason, they still blamed Samah, not her husband.
"I can understand a man hitting his wife, although I don't approve it, but, whatever the reasons, a woman shouldn't hit her husband. A man is a man. If he marries another woman, she should respect herself and leave him, not hit him in front of other people," says Amina, a woman in her sixties.
A recent study by the National Centre for Sociological and Criminological Research (NCSCR) says that Egyptian women come top in the global list of women who beat their husbands – 28 per cent of them do so.
American women come second with 23 per cent and then Indian women (only 11 per cent).
According to the study, Egyptian women who live in wealthy areas are more likely to hit their husbands; only 18 per cent of women living in poor areas do so.
Most women who confess to beating their husbands say that they have fallen out with them over money or because of jealousy. Sixty per cent of these women say that they are not comfortable with their marriage and that their life before getting married was much better.
Twenty-five per cent of those women also admit that their husbands insult them in front of other people and are sexually involved with other women – something they are not ashamed to discuss with their wives.
"The violence committed by women against their husbands may be the result of a lack of understanding between them. It's just like the democracy we now have in Egypt – no one is willing to listen to anyone else," explains Professor of Psychology at Suez Canal University Ismail Youssef.
Samah's story is true. She felt betrayed when he got married to another woman, which she calls betrayal. She couldn't stand being maltreated, so she decided to get her revenge by beating her husband.
"Men should not beat their wives and vice versa. The spouses must respect each other," adds Dr Youssef.
In another study, Professor Samira Nasr of the NCSCR says that, if the wife is weak or sick, she often stabs her husband, rather than hitting him, in order to kill him.
“In cases of women killing their husbands, 15 per cent poison them, 10 per cent club them to death and another 55 per cent shoot them," she adds.
"Men and women are equal in this society. If a man can give himself the right to hit his wife, she has the right to hit him back," stresses Asmaa Amin, a French-language teacher.
"If they lose their respect and start hitting each other, life becomes unbearable for them. There must always be respect."


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