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Searching role models
Published in Al-Ahram Weekly on 01 - 07 - 2010


By Lubna Abdel-Aziz
Must we keep sliding down a slippery slope into an abysmal pit of amorality? Are w e destined to sacrifice our spiritual and ethical values at the altar of technology? Do we not realize that we regress while we sincerely believe we progress? Each generation seems to yearn for 'the good old days.' Are our days, tomorrow's 'good old days'? Is this the epitome of civilization we have toiled and labored to create?
With my increasing number of grandchildren, I often wonder about the moral backbone of the society we bequeath them. Most children, adolescents and young adults seek role models to lead and guide them as they forge their way through life's maze of confusion. Albert Bandura, was one of the first psychologists to propose that people learn from other people by watching them. Those people eventually become their role models. By observing their heroes and heroines, they fashion and frame their habits, their looks, their behaviour, their demeanour. Who are those role models of today? Do they lead ethical and moral spiritual lives? Who do you wish your children and grandchildren to emulate on the present world arena?
Parents, naturally, are our first role models. In centuries past they remained so -- a living example of devotion, affection, honesty and goodness. During the present time, with the overpowering influence of the media, children develop outside influences that claim their attention and admiration. As the media controls a good portion of our lives, parents have taken a back seat as lifetime role models. Biotechnology has created a cult of amoral heroes. Throughout human existence an ideal of manhood was always one of a good husband and father, basically forthright and steadfast. Has it been replaced by Playboys, philanderers, and infidels, the Hugh Heffners and Michael Sheens. The traditional aspects of manhood, of respectability and fidelity are a dying quality of little worse. Those good providers, faithful husbands, devoted fathers, have seen their charm evaporate in this day and age. There certainly were the Don Juans of previous times. They were the exceptions then, now they are the rule.
Women have also played a significant role as idols despite their confinements to hearth and home. In a predominantly patriarchal society, they were able to prove that the "weaker sex" can still be outstanding and inspiring. We recall Cleopatra, Queen Elizabeth I, Catherine the Great, and in recent history Marie Curie, Indira Gandhi, and Helen Keller. Ancient examples of role models included spiritual leaders and devout Saints. Faithful Muslims wish to emulate the Holy Prophet Mohamed. Christians wish to live their lives as Jesus lived it. To Buddhists, Buddha's lifestyle was their ideal. In this day and age one is hard pressed to find anyone to pick as a role model.
The present crisis is not limited to the economy. We are facing a serious case of bankruptcy in our scruples and morals. Spiritual life is fast disappearing as parents no longer devote their time to their children, leaving them to their TVs, i-pods, mobiles and laptops. The media now plays parent, to the detriment of our family traditions and spiritual values. Our century was not devoid of spiritual leaders who mesmerized young and old. We watched in awe the lives of Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, Pope John-Paul II. They have all left us now, leaving behind a lusterless field where no roses grow. We thank God for Nelson Mandela, but beyond him darkness reigns.
Celebrity seems to be criterion enough for the young who blindly follow the blinding glitz of fame and fortune. Sports are a rich field for young men and women where they can seek and find role models. Indeed there were the Michael Jordans, Arnold Palmers and Jack Nicklauss. There was also Tiger Woods, but that was yesterday. Today his downfall has left us breathless and quite hopelessly desperate for a role model to look up to. Most sport stars have been transformed from heroes to crooks, drug and sex addicts, rapists and liars.
The movies have offered many a hero and heroine on the big screen. International stars where admired for their philanthropy, patriotism, idealism and social awareness. Compare John Wayne, Gregory Peck, Katherine Hepburn, Grace Kelly to the stars of today. Who would like your child to look up to and emulate? Even beauty standards have fallen drastically. We used to have Elizabeth Taylor and Ava Gardner, today its Hillary Swank and Sarah Jessica Parker. The lack of sufficient role models baffles the mind. With such few living choices are we to dig into our history books and bring to life men and women of past eras to present to our children? Can we afford to leave them to Brittany Spears and Tiger Woods?
Politics is a vast field of leadership and achievement. Admirable men and women have dedicated their lives to the services of their community. By leading with courage and integrity, they have been able to attract young men and women to public service. Let us pick a great and effective, moral, and honest politician today. Is there another Winston Churchill or Margaret Thatcher? Is there another Reagan or even a Kennedy? Do the Obamas of today fit the bill? Where is the charm, the style, the integrity? The captivating rhetoric of an Obama, the personal charm of a Clinton are empty attributes without integrity and sincerity.
Perhaps in the field of journalism we can find dedicated soldiers of the fair and balanced media with guts and fortitude, like Edward Morrow, William Hurst, and in our own neck of the Woods Mustapha and Aly Amin, Hassanein Heykal, all names conjured from past decades. If your son or daughter chooses to be in the news business, written, Audio or visual, who would you pick as a shining example of his/her future?
Psychologists are of the opinion that people learn from other people by watching them. They make career choices in what they feel and admire in others. More than 25% of smokers started to smoke because their role models were smoking in movies, or in real life. Research has deduced that having effective role models increases life satisfaction as well as a variety of health advantages. Having live role models has additional advantages, but where are they to be found!
Psychologists believe role models are indispensible for young boys and girls. Wanted - role models! This will help us ensure a better future for our children and grandchildren.
The idol of today pushes the hero of yesterday out of our recollection, and will, in turn, be supplanted by his successor of tomorrow.
-- Washington Irving (1783 -- 1859)


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